Sunday, December 26, 2010

where i am

If I could go back to being 8 years old and know exactly what my life is like right now, would I be happy? Would I be proud of who I am? Of the decision I've made? Of how far I've come? Would I be proud of all of the mistakes I've made? Would I try to change anything? Would I be proud of the people that I associate with? Would I be proud of the relationships I have with my family and friends?

If I was 8 and I knew where I am now I think I would be embarrassed. I think all I could say is "That's it? In 10 years from now that is what my life is going to look like? Is this some kind of sick joke?" I feel like I was a better person 10 years ago then I am today when I am an adult. I'm not sure I would change anything though, I made the decisions I made for a reason. I'm not sure that based on the decisions I've made in my life that I could be further along and happier but I would like to hope that maybe I could be happier and that I am on the road that will take me there.

Sometimes I just wonder that if my 8 year old self would feel nothing but pity for me then why on earth would anyone feel differently? I hope one day I will learn and grow and make decisions and maybe in another 10 years my now present self will be proud of my now future self. But for now I will just feel disappointed with where I am.

Monday, December 20, 2010

things i missed

I'm watching the news right now and I forgot how much I love watching the news and then staying up and watching Jay Leno. Leno is a funny funny man especially when jay walking or headlines is involved.

anyways, this is all for now. Happy holidays.

Thursday, December 2, 2010

lunch with the parental unit

So my dad and I went to lunch today and I semi told him and he semi guessed about my tattoos and things went a lot better then I expected. I just hope it goes that well when I sit down with both of my parents and we "discuss" it.... hmmm. I wonder what Sam will think. I am pretty sure she'll be the only member of my family who is surprised at all.... huh. Anyways, this is all for now. Wish me luck.