Guess who was in town!! My whole family! It was great! That only ever happens around Christmas but this Halloween was a total bonus! I love them. I really feel so blessed to be related to them. They are all so smart and hardworking. I really admire that. My family is full of crazy, loud, dominant personalities but we manage to make it work. I like how loud and quirky we are. It's adorable.
This is Jamie and Sam on Halloween.
We're pretty freeeeeakin' amazing.
This would be Jamie and Sam loving little Zara.
She's a doll. Her eyes blow me away.
We love when we get to see Zara.
Emily is a stud!
We really are friends, despite her face in this picture.
Today something wonderful happened. I was called up by an old Walden parent and she wants to hire me to tutor two of her kids once a week! I know it won't be a lot of money but I am ecstatic just to be working with some of the kids I love again! Teaching is without a doubt a huge passion of mine and I am so excited that I have been provided with this opportunity. I am starting tomorrow which means I don't have time to prep anything but I will be able to get a feel for what these kids need and where they are struggling. FREGGIN A! I'm so stoked! Yay yay yay yay yay!!
In other news, I found a super old picture of when I attempted to model for a girl I went to high school with. She was doing a project on the 7 deadly sins. I was slothfulness. When I see it I feel like I'm a member on America's Next Top Model but their pictures are obviously much much better. Anyways, here's the picture I found:
'Ello ladies and gents. I've had some pretty swell adventures the last few days. I thought I should document somewhere and well, why not just put it on the blog right? I've met some amazing people this year and we've been able to do a lot together. My favorite activity in the last week or so was visiting the Abandoned Provo Prison aka The Old Ironton Jail. Didn't know it existed? Me too, and I've been here for years. I guess it opened in '76 and the closed in '97 due to bed shortage and everyone who was there moved down to Spanish Fork when that facility was built and there was no longer a need for the one in Provo. Anyways, it's supposedly haunted because they've executed people there. There is an electric chair and a lethal injection table. Trippppppy stuff. Someone in my ward has been there before and told a friend about it who decided to get a group together and go in the middle of the night so I after hearing about it I had to go. There is something about sneaking around that still appeals to the rebel in me. When we got there we had to sneak through a hole in the fence and meander our way around the building to try to find a way in. While we were wondering around one of the girls in our group said she saw something inside and I replied saying that she was just psyching herself out, but of course, right as I said that we heard something fall off the building which made me cringe and feel pretty hypocritical. Someone pointed out that the noise came from around the corner so we had to investigate. As we looked around the corner there was a high pitch scream coming from the building so we all ran away as fast as we could screaming for our life. I wholeheartedly believe in demonic spirits and possessions so I was beyond freaked out. As we were running I literally peed my pants due to how scared I was. As far as I know no one in our group has been visited by any spirits since we went there. I'd call that a success.
Zackery moved to California a week ago. I'll admit it's been hard on me. I lost my best friend. He's crazy but I love him nonetheless. I have never been so open with anyone, even my therapists. I trust him more than I've ever trusted anyone else. I feel unconditional love and acceptance from him. I know that he is one of few who genuinely understands where I am coming from. He really looks out for me and he cares. He doesn't show it in a conventional way by any means but I like that. Hanging out with him has been very eye opening for me and I can't thank him enough for all the good he has done for me. I feel like I have grown a lot as a person. I have more confidence now than I have in a long time. He taught me that it is okay to say "No", I'll never be able to repay him for how much that has already benefited me. He made me believe that I can do better than what I have been settling for and I can't sell myself short. I admire how strong he is, he is quite possibly the strongest person I have met in my life and could ever hope to meet. I hope the absolute best for him but more than anything I hope that our lives cross paths again. He has been a true blessing in my life and he has my heart.
Salutations! I realized I never informed everyone of my weekend so here you go. Weekend and then some! Saturday was splendid. Mess twister was a success and quite possibly one of the funnest things I've ever experienced in my life. Rolling around in paint is always fun. I don't care how old you are. This activity rocks!! I didn't end up going to the concert which was okay. I went shopping with Cindy and some man friends instead. We hit up DI, Trendy Exchange and Forever 21. It was grand. Then Cindy and I had some Relief Society times and I feel like we went back out and hung out with more boys after that. We have some of the best guy friends in the world. I'm so grateful for them! Sunday my apartment went on an excursion to the mountains to take some pictures. The stunning Dunia and the always fun Kameron and Spencer came along as well.
I am very very very excited for this coming Saturday! So excited that I cannot wait until after the event to post about it. In the morning there is going to be a ward activity, but not just any activity mind you. We're playing messy twister! For those of you who don't know, that is twister with paint. It is sure to be a splendid time with some of my greatest friends. After turning into a painted twisty knot I'm heading up to Salt Lake with some more friends to see the Big Ass Show. A ton of bands are going to be playing music all day long! Groplove, AWOLNATION and Imagine Dragons are the bands I am most excited to see play but the other ones should be good too. Oh man! Saturday is going to be amazing! I'm stoked!
it is basically a quiz that lists all of the issues, various stances (a
really good representative sample!), and then tells you which
candidates share your ideology. Way, way better than just voting for a
I was immediately intrigued. I have always coincided myself an independent with a slight lefty style. I don't think I was too far off but my results were still surprising. I don't really even know who Jill Stein is... Oops? Well even if I did there's no way she'll be president.
It was still a good little quiz though. You should take it.
Hello hello. 'Tis the season to move back out and start school again. I must admit I was nervous to move back to my apartment. I was planning on living with my lovely female counterpart, Hilary, but due to unforeseen events she had to find a new place to live. I had the best time of my life last year and I was extremely worried nothing would ever come close to that but lucky for me, I have the best new roommate on the planet. Don't get me wrong, I like my roommates but there's something special about this girl. Her name is Cindy. I love her so very much and we clicked right off the bat. (People are shocked when we tell them we just met based on how we interact.) She is outgoing, funny, honest, spiritual, organized and considerate. We are the same age but I admire her so much. She has been a great influence on me thus far. She is truly brilliant and somehow manages two jobs, a double major at the Y and adventure times with Jamie on a regular basis. WHOA!
Anyways here are some pictures of our adventures so far.
All courtesy of Miss Cindy and her camera.
We love going to the park with all of our friends!
We love playing truth or dare at the park even more!
There is always picture taking...
Lots of picture taking.
But for some reason a lot of our man friends don't like being documented.
This makes us sad.
And when the park isn't enough we go power tumbling!
I've moved, transfered schools, seen death, traveled the world, had a few jobs and through that have seen many a people come and go from my life. Saying goodbye has always been difficult. But today was by far the hardest goodbye I've ever had to say. I had to say goodbye to all of the kids that I have been working with for the last 2 years. It broke my heart. I felt like I had been hit by a train. I couldn't stop shaking, my mind was racing, my stomach dropped and my heart was pumping so hard everyone around me could feel it. I think I literally went into shock. I said goodbye to most of the students back in May but having to say goodbye to the rest of them today really feels like the death of me. I haven't been able to eat all day and all I can think about are my kids.
These kids may not be biologically related to me but they are by all means MINE. I have worked with most of these guys everday for the past 2 years. We love each other unconditionally. They mean the world to me and I know I am a large part of their life as well. No matter where life will take me I will always root for them and if one were to call me in 20 years I'd love to chat and do whatever they might need. Maybe we should have a reunion one day? I wish that was socially acceptable... The idea of never seeing these kids again is really taking it's toll on me. I have never experienced such heart break.
It's interesting how emotions can take a toll on your body.
I literally feel ill.
I'll post pictures and stories of some of my favorite kids when I have the chance.
It'll be good to share my stories and love with the world.
I have been watching more Dexter lately. This is by no means unusual but with the most current season I have come to the realization that everyone has a "Dark Passenger". Now what is this Dark Passenger you might be asking? First of all, if you are not easily offended you should watch Dexter because it is a brilliant show and learn for yourself. Second, for those of you who won't watch the show, a Dark Passenger is basically the demon with in. The level of darkness within oneself that can be controlled or can control the person.
After watching 6 seasons I whole heartedly believe everyone has one. They are all different and some passengers are more dominant than others but we each carry one. What I found most interesting though is the point that the character Brother Sam (one of my favorite characters of the entire series) brings up. He suggests that everyone also has light it is just a matter of if we choose to let go of our darkness or embrace it. I believe this as well, even in this world. I can forgive James Holmes as well as Wade Page. There is good that can be found from these two recent shooting tragedies. There is light. There is a lesson. We just have to open our eyes and look. I believe in change for the better. I believe in forgiveness. I just hope others do too.
"I know about your darkness, but I also see your light." Brother Sam
It's almost strange the way humans can be united buy beats, tones, cords, keys and words strung together. Music can be an inspiring salvation to some. It is the key to a closed heart and mind. Music gives us the ability to express what words can not. It is an outburst of the soul really. I am so passionate about music. It is what keeps me going when nothing else can.
The world is a amazing thing. I have been outside a lot lately and have been able to embrace the beauty all around. I am so grateful that I live in such an awe inspiring place. Here are some pictures of my favorite sites from the last month or so.
My family struggles with what I believe to be a genetic hoarding problem. For those who are unfamiliar with this term hoarding is by definition "the excessive acquisition of and inability or unwillingness to discard large quantities of objects that would seemingly qualify as useless or without value". And holy shit it's a terrible terrible disorder. I'm sorry about the language but I am so done with all things hoarding at this point. A few posts ago I mentioned my grandmothers poor health, (she is doing much better now by the way, still doesn't remember me but everyone else she knows all about) due to recent events my parents have decided that she needs to live in a place with more hands on care than what is currently available to her. This decision means moving, which then creates the urge to slit your wrists. I am so certain that my mother is Jesus. You see, those hoarding shows which seem to be gaining popularity as of late are absolutely nothing compared to both of the prior homes she owned that we have cleaned out. Luckily this time around we had a one bedroom apartment. My mom spent hours cleaning every day and my sister and I would come help whenever we could and it is emotionally and physically tolling. (The picture above was taken over halfway through the clean up, which took an entire month mind you.)
It's so sad to see someone live in these conditions. At her last home I found a V8 which was about a decade past its due date and had turned black but my grandma continued to lecture me about how it was still good and she was planning on drinking it as I poured the black goop down the drain. At this apartment I was slightly more fortunate. I found some V8 fruit punch which was only 3 years old! Based on the flavor I guessed that it started as a light pink color. This icky brown really isn't too bad compared to the black stuff I had found prior. All I know is that I will never be able to drink any V8 product after what I've seen.
Another interesting tidbit that I had heard rumors of was that she had been going through the trash and taking other residents mail. I didn't believe this until I had to go through he magazines. Most of which weren't hers or even people I had ever heard her talk about. Chris who?? But alas I guess they were close enough that she felt fine taking his old magazines.
This is the 3rd house my family has worked on. We have at least one more and a storage unit before things are over. I love my grandma but I'm not sure how much more my family can take, especially my poor Mom.
My lovely friend Hilary and I went to see our beautiful man friend, Stephen Cope aka Officer Jenny play at the Muse a few weeks ago. After all this time he was finally headlining a show! He deserves it. He is the most adorable man I have ever met. He is more like a cartoon really. Uber upbeat, always wears a scarf and a blazer, constantly dancing and his smile never fades and so genuine that he is impossible to hate and his music is even better. He sang a song about a haunted house that still get stuck in my head. But the favorite was definitely the nakey nakey song which is yes, exactly how it sounds. This boy is amazingly catchy. The second he releases his EP I will be a proud owner of his music. I hope he goes far and if you ever have the opportunity to see him play you should, there is nothing else like it in the world. This boy has all my love in the world and fills me with happiness! You'd probably have the same response so just look him up on facebook already!